ballad for the broken hearted

so...
here you are
again

despite vowing
you would not be here,
that the next time
you would be smarter
here you are
feeling none the wiser
again

here you stand
at the edge of dreams
swallowed by the tides of life
swallowed by the...
"thanks but no thanks"
"you're just not enough"
"i love someone else"
(or sometimes
no words at all
just that slow and quick
demise of what seemed so sure)

you are here once again

you curse them
curse yourself
and curse the world
giving into lies
that are not true
lies that say
-failure
-fool
-hopeless
-alone

and you break
despite your promise not to
you break

and this time it's not just your heart
it's all of you
your will
your hope
your dreams
and for this split second of a moment
your ability to go on

so you promise
"never again"
though your words fall empty
and your fear feels full
as your sit in silent terror
of the thought of another again


for how many times have
you been here before?

and though you know it wasn't right for you
you miss your rocky bliss
your almost beginning
your friendship turned crush
turned crushed

and though you try not to cry
the tears come streaming
salty rivers
down your cheeks
burning the open wounds
of your wounded open heart
as you recount
words
actions
and non actions
that sting like a knife

but somewhere
under the mess of it all
somewhere
past the pain
past despair
past everything that tells you
to stop believing
in this silly cruel thing
we call love

somewhere...
a tiny voice prevails
a tiny knowing
that whispers softly, strongly

rest up
be strong
and wait...